I Want To Read The Quran

 

“I want to read the Quran,” this has been at the top of my brain for the past month. Why? Well… I can list some of the reasons here. 

Read, ˹O Prophet,˺ in the Name of your Lord Who created humans from a clinging clot.

Read! And your Lord is the Most Generous, Who taught by the pen humanity what they knew not.

— Dr. Mustafa Khattab, the Clear Quran

I’m beginning this post during my lunch break at work. I would often say that this is the worst timing to get any writing done as I’m slowly falling into my afternoon slump but I had to get these thoughts out of my head and on paper...or at least, typed out on my document here. 

I have just finished my moving process yesterday and while it took a whole lot out of me to physically move my luggage, boxes and other furniture I’ve accumulated for the past year, I am truly happier to live in this new space. It is small but spacious and more than enough for a girl standing at a whopping height of 5’1. 

While I admit there are plenty of times I just find myself exhausted after packing and hoisting my stuff out of my old apartment, a realisation sparked once I opened my boxes - I have so many books. 

And yes, I do have quite a number of books, especially at my parents’ house. I grew up with the largest bookshelf at home and I just loved adding another piece in my collection. I left it all when I moved out but here I’m finding myself again, surrounded by books albeit in smaller piles.

I remembered doubting my own reading schedule when I first started working. I was basically working every single day of the week and this is not uncommon in the world of media of course. But with my calendar blocked out for 100 hours per week, I was ready to sacrifice this small hobby to pursue my career. 

Fast forward a year later, I failed. Obviously.

Reading has always been the ultimate hobby that stayed with me since I was a child. From my Peter & Jane volumes to every popular teen-series like Harry Potter, The Vampire Diaries or The Hunger Games trilogy and then diving into the world of Murakami Haruki and other asian literature; in every step of the way, I was reading a book. 

This fascination I have with turning a new page, reaching a new chapter or screaming during a cliffhanger at the end of a volume is like a child in an amusement park. I wanted to relish each ride and every magical moment. 

Now, in my mid-20s, I have the strongest desire to read the Quran. 

I’ll admit, my mother used to drag me to my kelas mengaji and I was definitely not the most enthusiastic kid. In fact, because of this, I’ve never managed to khatam the Quran. Honestly… I’m quite ashamed to admit this.

And it is because of that shame I refused to face the Quran. I felt like I was not worthy to try and read through it anymore. I saw myself as a complete failure in the face of God to read His words. I’d still pray and read Yaasin but to restart my journey with the Quran, it was too hard and I felt too embarrassed to begin. 

Of course now, I wish I had taken the opportunity to slap myself or something. 

With His Grace and Blessings, I finally found a spark of interest in the Quran again when I followed Asma Nasarrudin on her Instagram. At first, I followed her out of interest towards her modest fashion. It was chic and fitting for my own aesthetic. Then she begins to open up about her journey with Islam and soon I find her posting stories about her relationship with the Quran and how she studies it. 

It was beautiful to hear her explanations and it just felt so fresh to me. She made reading the Quran seem so easy and even addicting. And soon, I began my research as a follow-up to my newly found discovery. 

I tried pin-pointing the easiest Quran Translations and began adding them to my cart. I found other people online who share their Quran studies and how they do it. I was diving headfirst into this new world of modern and contemporary Quran reading and it was tickling every little curiosity node in my brain. 

Two weeks ago, I decided to join my family’s little weekly usrah where I was not only able to learn more about my own religion, I managed to spend quality time with my relatives whom I haven’t seen in person for years now. A week later, I was tasked to give a talk about Barakah and how we can implement it in our lifestyle. Long story short, the research I did for this topic multiplied my desire to grow closer to Allah SWT.

This usrah had my curiosity for Islam and the Quran swelling up from the inside out and now, I knew I had to take action. It is time and I can’t wait any longer. 

So after work yesterday, I took a trip to KLCC and headed up to Kinokuniya where I spent a little over and hour browsing through the Islam section. I left the store with The Holy Quran and the Barakah Journal. 

I spent these past two days skimming through the books and getting an idea of my plan. 

I hope to track my progress with the help of the Barakah Journal by Mohammed Faris and Abdallah Rothman. It has weekly and daily spreads with prompts to keep me accounted for the next 6 months. I was a tad bit intimidated at first but the prompts are fairly reasonable and allows wiggle room for change, tweaks and adaptation. Insya-Allah, with this journal and the various resources by the authors on their website The Productive Muslim, I’ll be able to implement the changes and lessons into my daily lifestyle.

Of course, the main character is The Holy Quran, English translation and commentary by Abdullah Yusuf Ali. It’s a smaller scale compared to other series of English Quran translations but the spread is relatively simple to follow and I love how the synopsis for every surah feels like a storytime nugget. The writing may feel a bit overwhelming at times as it is written to be as close to the Arabic meaning literature-wise but I enjoy it nonetheless. 

I hope to finish reading through all the surah by the next three months and Insya-Allah, I wish to broaden my prospect by investing in at least another translation which would aid me in terms of understanding all the Surah better. Looking into The Noble Quran and The Clear Quran next! 

By the time these 6 months pass, we’d probably be looking to spend another Ramadhan and by then, I hope to read through the Quran within those precious 30 days. I know I would need the guidance of a teacher and I should look into that too. 

Honestly, I’m just excited. As of finishing this post, I’ve spent 3 nights with the Quran translation and I treat it like the good book I read before bed. It eases my mind and sets the tone for the next day and the challenges I may face. I wake up, eager to finish my work day and get back to the book as soon as I can. 

I pray to always have His Guidance and His Gratification on my newly found passion for His Word. I know I am bound to fall off the rails some time in this journey and only with His Guidance I can keep my foot on the ground and keep moving forward. For I am His willing servant who wishes nothing more than to be close to Him. 

- Nur Anis Diana